


Feel Me

by zugzwangxo



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: M/M, Moreid, Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-23
Updated: 2016-03-18
Packaged: 2018-05-15 15:06:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5790094
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zugzwangxo/pseuds/zugzwangxo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a particularly gruelling case, Derek finds himself needing to protect the man he loves, giving into his desire, he finds letting go of his inhibitions extremely rewarding.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

There was no such thing as a clear cut case, every single unsub came with their own challenges and lessons for the team. Even classic psychologies had their variations, showing so many permutations of human relationships affecting the human psyche. Some cases were harder to accept the details on than others, especially those with children and those that left behind grieving partners or parents.

Derek looked out over the hillside scene through his darkly shaded aviators, feeling the heat of the evening sun starting to fade. There were several open, shallow graves, each cordoned off and attended by a lab tech as they collected evidence. He’d been stood there for some time, so long that he’d shifted his weight onto one leg and rested his hands on his hips lazily. Something about this case had stirred something.

“Something bothering you?” asked David as he walked up from behind and surveyed the scene.

“I dunno,” replied Derek with a sigh. “You ever get the feeling that attachment to others only leads to weakness?”

“Morgan, all of these couples died thinking they were saving their partners. It’s sick, but in a way it kind of reaffirms your belief in humanity a little to know that there are still people out there that’ll die for their loved ones,” David sighed too. “If I had the chance, I’d go back and trade places with Erin. I just wish I could let her know that she could have known that.”

Derek smiled weakly to his colleague to show he understood but at that moment, Spencer had arrived, looking over the scene too. The three exchanged wordless greetings but Derek seemed distant still, making an excuse and wandering off to find the others.

“Is he ok?” asked Spencer. “Did I do something?”

“I don’t know, kid,” replied David, shrugging. “He’s seemed more and more distant the more we learned about the case. I guess something was hitting a little close to home.”

Spencer glanced back to watch Derek walking alone in the distance, still wondering what exactly was on his mind.

~

Having been able to build up a profile quite quickly, the team had very little paperwork to do once they’d arrived back at the office. Most had already left but Spencer, Derek and Aaron had remained. Derek and Aaron were discussing the last part of the case in the kitchenette when Spencer walked in to make himself one last coffee before home.

“…ok, thanks, Morgan,” Aaron said, turning to leave. “Night, Reid.”

“Night, Hotch,” he replied as they passed each other. Derek and Spencer acknowledged each other but Derek started to move away. “Wait, Morgan…”

“Yeah?” asked Derek as he stopped, eager to leave but trying not to be rude.

“Is everything alright?” asked Spencer, pursing his lips and tucking his hair behind his ear as he leaned against the counter.

“I’m fine, kid, don’t worry,” he replied trying to turn away.

“There was clearly something in that case that affected you,” Spencer started. “And based on the subject matter, I’d guess it was about your relationship with someone.”

“Did you just profile me?” Derek asked, turning around again. “Don’t do that.”

“I didn’t mean to I’m just… worried.”

“Don’t be,” Derek seemed almost angry but he knew Spencer was only being a friend. But that was the problem. “I just… there are people I care about and sometimes these cases make me worry.”

“That’s why we do what we do,” Spencer added but Derek shook his head.

“We’ve proved so many times that the people we struggle to protect the most are the people around us and I’ve seen you get hurt on more than one occasion,” he replied.

“Me?” Spencer asked, confused.

“Never mind,” Derek said, turning away again but Spencer moved forward, taking his hand to stop him.

There was a pause as Derek looked down at the hand on his, but he wasn’t angry. Instead, he put his other hand on top of Spencer’s in mutual respect.

“Morgan, you told me something once, without saying it. I’ve never forgotten that,” Spencer started, looking at their hands too. “I know we all care about each other but you’ve always had my back. Always.”

“And I always will, ok?”

“But…”

“Don’t make me say it, kid.”

“I just want to know for sure.”

“You already know, I can tell… night, Reid,” said Derek as he turned yet again but Spencer saw the opportunity to repay him, stepping up behind him and wrapping his arms around his shoulders and resting his head against him. “Alright, fine. I care about you.”

“I know,” replied Spencer but Derek turned around, looking into his eyes.

“No, I mean I care about you,” he started, taking hold of Spencer’s hands. “I think about you all the time and sometimes I feel guilty but most of the time it’s just… I don’t even know what.”

“Wait… you mean…?” he asked.

“Yeah, Reid,” he said, trying to slope away again but Spencer moved around him.

“Why didn’t you say something?” he asked

“You’re kidding, right?”

“I’m serious, why would you let something like that go?”

“Let it go?”

There was a pause as they stared at each other, trying to figure each other out and what they were both feeling in that moment. It was strange to Spencer, considering he’d always seen Derek as something of a player with the ladies but then in was psychology 101 for his upbringing. Neither had noticed the magnetism acting upon them as they subconsciously edged closer to each other till eventually they were inches from each other. It was unexplainable, but in that moment, Derek could no longer hide what he wanted, staring at Spencer’s lips as he swallowed nervously.

Finally, and without objection, he leaned in, pressing his lips against Spencer’s, letting his hand slide up his side to cup his jaw as they kissed. It took Spencer a moment to really understand it but he eventually kissed Derek back, letting his hands slide around his waist, allowing himself to be pushed back up against the counter as the pent up feelings were finally being released in the darkened and silent office space.

Hands wandered from inch to inch as they couldn’t help but explore this new and exciting physicality that they could now discover. Spencer tugged at Derek’s belt, driving him to lift Spencer up onto the counter, pushing his knees apart so that his waist could slide between them. It hadn’t taken long for Spencer’s fingers to undo the button of Derek’s jeans, letting his fingers slide along the gap created, caressing the skin beneath with his fingernails. The shudder that surged through his body caused him to break contact with Spencer’s lips for a moment to gasp but there was no respite. Spencer let his lips move along Derek’s jaw line till he found his neck, nipping gently at his ear before kissing the soft skin just beneath it. At the same time, he slid his hand down into Derek’s jeans, takin hold of him firmly and pulling him free.

Spencer’s stroking and teasing was almost too much for Derek to take, pulling his colleague closer against him as all of the fantastical scenarios played through his mind. It took a short while of Spencer’s hand running up and down his length for him to appreciate just what was happening.

“Mmmm, Spencer, this is… we can’t…” he started as a small part of him tried to resist. “This is insane.”

“Then tell me to stop,” replied Spencer.

“Oh… I can’t, Reid, I.. can’t…” Derek finally opened his eyes, looking at Spencer before looking down to what he was doing.

“Does it make it better?” Spencer asked. “Knowing that we shouldn’t be doing this here?”

“Maybe,” he replied with a gasp and a grin.

“Would it make it better if I used my mouth?” The devious smirk that had grown across Spencer’s face told Derek that he was serious, making him stutter a little but he was too late to object. Sliding forward, Spencer pushed Derek back, turning him round to press him against the counter as he lowered down.

Derek closed his eyes, letting his head roll back with a gasp as Spencer’s warm and moist lips slipped over him, taking in much more than expected. As he opened his eyes again, he looked around the office space, at his surrounding and feeling completely exposed in every way possible. At the same time, he didn’t care because it was Spencer and it felt so good that he had to grip the counter with both hands.

That was all he could take, he wanted more and he wanted it now, pulling Spencer up from his knees and staring into his eyes. No words passed between the two but they both knew what was about to happen, grabbing up their bags and turning off the lights.

By the time they were ready to leave the office, Spencer had completely forgotten about the coffee that he’d made for the journey home. Just then, he knew he had something much stronger to keep him awake that night and he couldn't wait, pulling Derek into the elevator. The doors hadn't even fully closed when they re-entwined, unsure how they would make it to Derek’s car let alone his bed.


	2. Chapter 2

It was a miracle that they even made it through the door, partly because they were so engrossed in each other that Derek had trouble unlock it but mostly because the door wasn’t designed for two grown men to fit through in such close proximity. 

His hands travelled along the defined muscular frame of his colleague, finding two points at which he could play. As their lips and bodies collided together in Derek’s hallway, Spencer couldn’t help but let his thumbs brush against his collar and protruding hip bone, leaving him almost helpless. The tingle that coursed through him meant that for all his strength, he was barely able to stand, pulling Spencer against him as he stumbled to the wall. Enough was enough. It was Derek’s turn to show Spencer just what he had in mind whenever he thought about him.

Sliding himself out from the wall, Derek turned, pinning the much smaller Spencer against the wall instead. With his lips pressed firmly to Spencer’s neck, Derek let his hands snake around to his front, sliding down to the edge of his pants as he pressed into him from behind.

For the second time, Spencer was able to feel Derek up close, but this time, his hardened cock was pressing into his behind through their pants and threatening to burst through at any moment. The idea of Derek taking control of him there and then left him weak at the knees and he offered no resistance to the hand that slid into his pants to take hold of him.

“Fuck…” gasped Spencer as Derek began to slowly roll his hips into him from behind, matching the pace of the hand around his cock. Spencer’s nails dug into the painted plasterboard as he tried to steady himself, feeling Derek’s other hand gripping his waist for leverage. Each thrust, each pump of the hand, each breath caused waves of desire to soak through him, making him slowly reach back and hold onto Derek’s muscular arm.

Suddenly, Derek’s hand slipped from Spencer’s pants and he pulled completely away from the young doctor, leaving him with a deep sense of confusion and disappointment. The grin that had spread on Derek’s face as he continued to back away toward the stairs told Spencer that it was nowhere near over.

“I’ve got something for you, pretty boy,” he said, teasingly. “But you’ll have to come get it.”

Spencer followed as Derek headed up the stairs, wondering just what it was he was talking about, moving past old photos that hung in frames on the walls. Derek stepped through a door, leaving Spencer to follow blindly through the darkness.

“Derek?” he called out as he moved across the threshold. “What’s…”

Two strong hands pulled at his arms, practically dragging Spencer off of his feet till he felt something meet the backs of his legs. In a whirl of movement, he felt himself fall backwards onto a soft, warm duvet before he felt Derek’s presence loom over him.

The athletically built Derek was perched, kneeling with one knee between Spencer’s and was smiling down at him as he leaned over to pull the chord on the bed-side lamp. As the room was illuminated, Spencer could see that it was in fact Derek’s bedroom, coated with memories of being physically superior to nearly everyone around him, from college football trophies to FBI trainer awards. He had just enough time to think that it was unsurprising with all of his physicality that he’d be this domineering in his sex life too before Derek’s lips pressed firmly against his own again.

Derek shifted his weight, placing his other knee between Spencer’s, pushing lightly to tell him to widen the gap. The moment Spencer complied, he was able to lower himself, fitting his hips into his colleague’s with ease before rolling himself into him once more.

The feel of Derek’s arousal pressed against his own was almost too much to bare, causing Spencer to gasp into Derek’s lips. A hand crept down between them, undoing the button of Spencer’s pants and freeing him from the restriction to yet again slide slowly up and down his length. Spencer shifted so that his pants would lower from him, giving Derek greater access but rather than keeping his grip, Derek’s hand slid down Spencer’s cock and between his legs to tease against his hole.

“M… Morgan,” he stuttered. “Be gentle… it’s been a little while since…”

“Shhh… it’s ok…” replied Derek, letting his finger circle around and around, tapping lightly at his hole with every pass. “I will always be gentle… to start with.”

Spencer swallowed hard, letting extremely lewd images float through his mind as to what Derek might have been insinuating. In his distraction, he hadn’t noticed that Derek’s weight had lifted from him for a moment. It wasn’t till he felt the wet on Derek’s finger did he realise what it was that he’d done.

He heard the click of the cap snapping shut before the bottle of clear, loose gel landed a foot or so away from his shoulder. Knowing what was coming, Spencer tried to relax and allow Derek’s finger to enter him slowly and carefully.

It was uncomfortable at first, feeling almost unnatural but as the single finger set itself deeper it began to feel less so, pressing lightly against his prostate and sending a shiver through his body. The finger slid out a little then back in, causing a gasp to be released from Spencer’s lips yet again.

“Tell me if it’s too much,” requested Derek, to which Spencer nodded, relaxing in anticipation of the next finger. Derek couldn’t help but admire how good Spencer looked, even as his head rolled back and his mouth opened in reaction to the second finger all he could think of was how sweet his lips were.

Spencer couldn’t help but wrap his hand around his own cock while the two fingers slowly moved within him, it felt so good. The arching of his back made Derek want him all the more, knowing that he was experienced and willing as well as being the most beautiful living being he’d ever met.

“Ok, I think I’m ready,” exclaimed Spencer after a few moments but Derek shook his head.

“You’re gunna need one more, kid,” he explained.

“Really?” Spencer asked, squirming a little as he felt the next finger move into place but then a smirk spread across his lips. “Well, I suppose you are quite large.”

“Uh huh,” chuckled Derek as he pressed all three fingers a little deeper, being sure to move slowly to start with.

Spencer shuddered as Derek’s fingers reached the sweet spot once more but Derek was concentrated on freeing himself with his free hand. The muscular mass leaned over Spencer briefly, pushing deep yet again and leaving him with little choice but to keep working himself.

“Oh my God…” Spencer gasped as the combination of everything had him almost bursting at the seams. “Morgan, get inside me.”

Derek didn’t need to be told twice. Having applied the condom with his free hand and reached for the lubricant, he too was ready and not a moment too soon. Watching Spencer this entire time had made him so hard his throbbing pulse was almost painful. Removing his fingers, he generously applied the lubricant to himself before leaning forward, pulling Spencer’s pants away a little more before placing his wet tip against the much wider hole.

“We still good?” Derek asked as he pressed the head of his length into the hole a little, watching as Spencer closed his eyes and bit both of his lips together.

“Mhmm,” he forced, trying to relax onto Derek’s sizable cock.

“I’ll go slow…” he replied but was cut off with a gasp as his tip slipped inside suddenly. Spencer had let out a grunt of discomfort before relaxing as the thickest part had made its way inside, beginning to moan as his hand slid slowly down his own cock. Derek moved his hips slowly at first, teasing his way into Spencer so that he could become accustomed to not only his length but his girth as it slid within him. For a few moments it was as though they were having sex in slow motion but as alluded to, Spencer needed the time to adapt and the frustration would have to wait just a little while longer.

The moment Spencer felt comfortable, her reached up to Derek, pulling him down by his shoulder so that he could kiss him once more. Letting his tongue explore the inside of Derek’s lips as Derek’s cock slowly explored the inside of him, he couldn’t take the wait any longer.

“Fuck me,” he said breathily. “Morgan, fuck me.”

Derek needed no further indication, pushing himself deep inside the young profiler, gripping onto his throat a little as he did so. It was everything Spencer had hoped and dreamed it would be, as the powerful, muscular mountain of a man took control of him. Taking hold of Spencer’s cock, he managed to match his own pace with his hand, holding him firmly and sliding up and down his shaft with each roll of his own hips.

Spencer hadn’t lied, but the only way that Derek could tell was by how tight he was, gripping every inch of him as he moved in and out of his hole and it wasn’t long before he was breathing heavily from the intensity of the pleasure. Letting his lips move away from Spencer’s, he kissed his way down to his collar bone, letting Spencer moan aloud as Derek continued to work him both inside and out.

“Oh my fucking God, kid,” he whispered into Spencer’s ear. “Oh my God, you feel so good.”

Spencer could only respond with a loud moan as Derek slide back and forth over his prostate while his hand slid up and down his entire length. He knew he wasn’t going to last much longer but then by the sound of it, neither was Derek.

“I’m gunna… I’m… I’m…” Spencer tried to explain but was cut off as he practically cried out. A hot, sticky mess spurted from him with great emphasis, soaking itself instantly into his shirt as it landed. “Oh fuck… Morgan… cum for me… I want to feel you cum for me.” He managed to speak between panting but Derek couldn’t hear him. Derek’s entire world was spinning as the surge of endorphins claimed every part of his body in an explosion of chemical release like the pressure of the building frustration had been suddenly alleviated.

Derek collapsed into Spencer, his great, sculpted arms were unable to hold him up any longer as his shuddering body was left weak with ecstasy. He managed to shift to pull himself from deep inside his colleague but neither of them were willing to even attempt moving getting up, panting heavily.

“Fucking hell, Reid…” was all Derek could say as he rolled to the side.

“Uh huh,” replied Spencer.

“I mean…”

“Yeah…”

“Wow…”

“Exactly…” said Spencer, letting his body sink into the bed as Derek tried to tidy himself. All he could think was how this was insane, that there would have been no way he’d thought that this would ever happen and yet, here they were. Lovers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long, I've been moving house!
> 
> This is the first time I've ever attempted slash so yeah, tell me what you think but be nice or I'll cry xo


	3. Chapter 3

With a slow and steadily growing smile, Derek looked up from his desk toward Spencer, the clock seeming to be reluctant to tick away the time till they got to go home. The wait was more than Spencer could take, forcing him to drink down his eighth or ninth cup of coffee that afternoon. To anyone else, it just looked like they were both eager for the weekend, but to each other it was something different. Every glance between them gave them all the more reason to want to get out of there, so much so that when the clock did eventually tick down to the end of the work day they weren’t seen for dust.

Derek had promised something to Spencer, and it had them both as excited as the first time. Bursting through the door of Spencer’s apartment, the pair stumbled from one piece of furniture to another, knocking over the small table by one of the chairs and spilling books across the floor. Neither of them seemed to want to part from the other, clinging to each other as their lips locked together.

Their intention had been the bedroom, however, neither made it that far. Tumbling over the arm of the sofa, Derek landed hard on his back, dragging Spencer down on top of him. Spencer had landed between Derek’s legs, causing him to grin broadly as he looked into his colleagues eyes.

“You wanna take me, pretty boy?” asked Derek, grinning back to him.

“Mmmm, absolutely,” he answered in a low and breathy tone.

Spencer’s hand slid slowly beneath his larger, more muscular partner, tugging on the back of his jeans to let him know he wanted it now. Shifting his weight, Derek undid the button of his pants, letting them slide off as Spencer raised up out of the way.

Derek was midway through taking off his shirt when he heard the unmistakable click of a plastic cap being opened, and the moment he was able to drop the shirt onto the coffee table, Spencer was upon him again. An arm slid down under the athletically-built agent before two fingers slid between his buttocks, warm and wet against his hot hole. The fingers slid up and down the gap, passing over their destination, teasing him as Spencer leaned back down between Derek’s thighs.

“Mmmm, pretty boy,” groaned Derek. “What are you gonna do to me?”

“I’m gonna fuck you,” whispered Spencer, leaning further over him till his erection pressed against Derek’s ass cheek, before slipping a wet finger into his tight hole.

“Oh, fuck,” gasped Derek. “Tell me again.”

“I’m gonna fuck you,” he whispered again, this time, a little louder as he pushed in a second finger. The second one caused Derek to wince a little but it didn’t hold back his charming grin for long. That was until the third finger followed, forcing him to groan and wince at the same time.

“Fuck, kid, I’m ready,” he almost whimpered. “I’m ready, do it.”

Spencer didn’t need to be told twice, pulling his fingers from inside of Derek slowly and causing him let out a sharp breath. The hand moved to take hold of himself, guiding his length into place and pressing the tip into the entrance of the widened hole.

Derek grimaced a little at the discomfort but in no way wanted it to stop, feeling Spencer press into him bit by bit. With gradual pushing, Spencer was able to pull out a little then push forward again, loosening the grip of Derek’s tight hole just enough to start rolling his hips.

The warm, wet, tight space was enough to make Spencer grip the sofa firmly with his supporting hand when he began picking up the pace a little, his free hand sliding up against Derek’s balls on its way to his cock. Taking his girth in his fingers, he began to work him at the same pace as his hips rolled, giving himself a little extra leverage.

“Oh my… oh,” Spencer exclaimed, dropping to his elbow and leaning against Derek’s muscular torso. The free hand moved behind Derek’s neck and gripped his shoulder, enabling him to pull himself into his coworker even harder.

Derek wrapped his legs up and around Spencer’s waist, pulling himself around and giving him extra access to push deeper inside. The feeling of Spencer moving inside him while his hand pumped his cock was overwhelming, urging him to move with his lover in their concupiscent entanglement. Each push sent tingles through his body and the growing pace of Spencer’s hand found him unable to control his rate of ascent.

“Mmmm, fuck me, pretty boy,” moaned Derek as he closed his eyes and tipped his head back.

“Oh fuck,” replied Spencer, his partner’s voice pulling him closer to the brink but what Derek did next was unexpected.

Ever feeling the need to be the one in control, Derek shifted his weight, taking hold of the much lighter agent with his enlarged arms and legs before rolling them off the edge of the sofa. Spencer landed on his back, cushioned from the landing by Derek’s arms but remaining inside him the entire time.

Sitting upright and shifting onto his knees, Derek began to bounce lightly, taking Spencer’s throbbing shaft from beneath him. His eyes closed as he leaned his head back, the hot, building feeling teasing forward with each stroke of Spencer’s hand and push of Spencer’s cock. Rising and falling and rising and falling, he rode Spencer, keeping up as much of the pace as he could in an attempt to please him while satisfying himself in Spencer’s hand.

“I wanna feel it, Spencer,” Derek half whimpered. “I wanna feel you blow your load.”

Spencer couldn’t even manage to reply in English, just groaned loudly, his laboured breathing telling Derek that he wouldn’t have to wait too much longer for what he wanted. He leaned even further back, resting on his palms so that his shoulders would remain still as his hips moved quickly and forcefully, fucking Spencer’s fist and taking his cock hard.

“Fuck… fuck… fuck…” gasped Spencer before holding his breath for a moment. He was close, so close was nearly painful but it wouldn’t last much longer.

Derek could feel the hot shudder of Spencer’s shaft inside him as he erupted, arching his back and crying out but he didn’t let up. The more athletic agent pumped everything he could from Spencer, still driving his dick into the tight grip of the fingers of one of Spencer’s hands while the other dug its nails into the carpet below.

Suddenly, Derek too cried out, his resultant spurting ardently across Spencer’s body and leaving streaks of sticky fluid on his skin before he slumped over toward him. Both men panted for a few moments, saying nothing, just coming down from the high enough to relearn the English language.

“That was…” started Derek, still panting heavily.

“uh huh…” replied Spencer as Derek, pulled himself free and fell to his side. “It certainly was.”

The pair laid together, naked and panting, trying hard to recover but not through want to get up, more out of a need to clean up before they could relax into one another.

“Spencer,” said Derek.

“Yeah?” he responded.

“I just wanted to say, I’m glad we did this.” Derek turned his head to look at Spencer, who turned to look back.

“Me too, Derek.”  


**Author's Note:**

> This is my attempt at slash EVER so comments and feed back and love would be awesomeee!


End file.
